Saturday, November 7, 2009

2,074 / 50,000 - Snow White and Rose Red

(Here is my writing snippet for the amazing Super Pi.  Sorry if it doesn't make sense, but it's not exactly the beginning of the story, though it is close.  Enjoy.)

“Lady White,” came the frantic cry as someone careened down the hallway.  “Lady White?  Are you in here?”
“Harvest,” Snow called out from the kitchen.  “What have I told you about calling me lady?”
“My apologies, my lady,” the orange-eyed man said once he managed to stumble through the doorway.  “I am aware that you are not old enough to officially be our lady, but that will not change the fact that you are Lady White.”
“Mistress Saffron does not think it’s proper,” Snow pointed out as she got off from the table where she had been pealing potatoes.
“I come to the Lady when there is a problem,” Harvest assured.
“You know he’s never going to learn,” Azure called out from where he was washing pots.  “Go ahead and leave the potatoes.  Violet and Amaranth will finish when they come back from the store rooms.”
Snow nodded and put down the knife.  She used Azure’s dishes water to rinse her hands off in and then hurried off with Harvest.  Harvest was a blacksmith and very capable of dealing with almost any disaster.  For the older man to be having a problem meant that the culprits were among a choice group.
Auburn called a bear, on accident,” Harvest explained as they quickly walked out into the courtyard.  “It was not exactly friendly, and so young Miss Rose picked up a small stick to deal with the creature.  Auburn did not agree, and things have now devolved.”
“The bear?” Snow asked.
“Sienna is keeping it calm for now, but the creature is on edge,” Harvest warned.
“The small stick?”
“About as thick as the bear’s arm.”
If it had been anyone else who had picked up a so-called small stick, Snow would have believed it a genuinely normal twig.  Her sister, on the other hand, was more connected to her magic than most her age and so a small stick could actually be a tree trunk.  Snow loved her sister dearly but sometimes wished that the young Red would think a little bit more before she leapt into action.
“About the bear...” Snow started but then stopped as they left the castle wall and saw the scene herself.
The bear was huge, larger than was normal, and it certainly looked agitated.  The bear’s brown coat was coated with frost and snow as it looked more than upset about having its hibernation interrupted.  Everyone was trying to keep a reasonable distance from the huge beast.  Well, most everyone.
Auburn was taking responsibility for her mistake and trying to communicate with the bear, from behind Rose, to no avail.  Rose had a tree branch slung over her shoulder and the thirteen-year old was watching the bear closely.  The vibrant red eyes clearly spelled out a challenge to the bear.  With a sigh, Snow marched up to her sister.
Auburn, Rose, please step back,” Snow said.
Rose tuned quickly and nearly brained Auburn and Snow with the tree branch.  Auburn obeyed and quickly backed up to join the adults.  Rose just looked at her sister, a sort of ‘you first’ challenge.  The adults rolled their eyes at the sisters.  The daughters of the former Lord White certainly ignored their own personal safety as much as their father did.
“Rose, please do as I ask,” Snow said quietly.  “I was with Harvest so I forgot to grab my cloak.  I forgot it was freezing.”
“Give me a boost and I’ll whack it back to its cave in one swing,” Rose said.  “If anything, it won’t complain since the hit will probably knock all the snow off.”
Snow sighed but could not help the smile on her face.  “Momma Sienna,” she called out.  “How is it?”
The older woman, her chocolate brown eyes fixed on the bear, did not respond.  That was not a good sign.  Sienna was one of the strongest adults when it came to dealing with creatures.  Rose gave her sister a worried glance as their surrogate mother finally waved her hand in an indication that the bear was not cooperative.
“Please back up, Rose,” Snow said.  “I’m going to go boost Ma Sienna’s magic.”
“That requires practically walking around the bear,” Rose pointed out.  “Can’t let you do that without protection.  Coming with and no complaints.”
They never got past the argument as a low growl grabbed the bear’s attention.  A large grey wolf, like the bear, bigger than what was normal, slowly stalked toward the bear.  The wolf’s owner calmly walked alongside and eyed the creature.  Even in its state of agitation, the bear seemed a little hesitant as it looked at Jade.  The young huntsman’s eyes were three distinctive colors, making him a rarity as the only person able to use three distinctive types of magic.
“Jade Green,” Sienna called out to her son.  “You and Silver better stop antagonizing it.”
“Where is it, Mom?” Jade asked.  “There is something in it that’s hurting it.”
“It has a thorn stuck in its right shoulder,” the woman answered after a quick pause.  “Don’t you dare.”
“It’s not a thorn,” Jade grumbled a little.  “Mom, we just need to get it out.  The bear should calm down after that.”
“I’ll hold it still,” Rose offered.
“No,” several people called out.
“Dive will get it,” Jade explained as he pointed to the hawk in the air.
“Aw,” Rose whined.  “I wanted something a little more exciting.  Like you trying to jump on top of it while I beat it with a stick.”
“Stop trying to make things more complicated,” Snow chided her sister.  “If you think things through then you’ll find a simple solution.”
“But that’s not as fun,” Rose said as they watched the hawk land on the bear.
The bear was so focused on the growling wolf that it paid no mind to the bird.  After a few moments, the bear rapidly calmed down.  The creature became docile so quickly that Momma Sienna almost fell down in surprise.  Papa Forrest had arrived and was trying to cover up his laughter at the fact that his family was once again causing chaos.
Auburn,” Ma Sienna called to her daughter.  “It’s quite calm now.  You can talk to it.  It seems to have taken a liking to you and Rose.”
“Why Rose?” Auburn asked as she hurried back to the bear.
“I agree,” Rose added.  “I was the one who wanted to hit it with a stick.”
Snow watched Dive as the hawk flew away, something shiny in its beak.  “What…” she started to ask Jade.
“Later,” he said quietly.  “I’m going to check on Dive.”
“You know,” Snow said.  “One of these times I’m going to lock you in a room and make it later.  You better tell me this time.  At least tell me this.  Does it have something to do with what you had told my father?”
Jade looked at his adopted sister with his tri-colored eyes gave a slow nod and left quickly.  Snow now knew for a fact the reason for Jade’s hesitation.  Whatever the young huntsman had found out all those years ago had done more than affect his eye color.  The former Lord White had become obsessed with the mystery at the cost of his health.
Snow sighed, a little bit with relief as Harvest came over and warmed up the area.  She knew she could get obsessive with studying like her father had, but her father had only become truly obsessive after Snow’s mother had died.  Right now, Snow had other things to think about rather than worrying too much over a mystery: like deciding if she should let Auburn and Rose adopt the bear, and wondering if she would ever see that handsome prince from Outside again.

1 comment:

  1. I like it! It's fun, but it does start right in the middle of the action. I liked that part, but when the characters start talking about different things and assume the reader knows about their past, it did get a little confusing.

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